An Educational Blog

First off, HAPPY BIRTHDAY HEATHER!!!! Heather has always been able to call me "old" ever since we first met in college. She said she thought I was "OLD.... like 30 or something" when I was only 21. But today she herself is "older" and closer to 30. Heather is most likely the coolest band teacher in the state of Iowa. Not only does she have a music degree from the illustrious Iowa State University, but Heather is educated and licensed in the art of shopping. Seriously - I think she is the closest thing I know to a "professional shopper" which is awesome because she knows where to get the best deals and the nicest stuff! I'm always amazed when we're out looking for stuff and her ability and efficiency to shop! So Happy Birthday Heather..... hope the kids brought in cupcakes for you!

Congrats also to Rob and Leslie in New York (NEW YORK CI-TY?!?!?!?!) on the birth of a beautiful baby girl, Phoebe. I anxiously await meeting her and the donuts that come with a new birth!!!

So today's blog will be part of my BigShow's Educational Series. Unfortunately it will be directed to my Rochesteronians but it is something that everyone can benefit from. Today's topic is:

RULES FOR DRIVING ON A 6 LANE HIGHWAY

Now that the Great Wall of Highway 52 is complete and all 6 lanes of 52 are open, I think it is way overdue to educate some "individuals" (sorry, that's the nicest word I could think of to describe the idiots) on how you should drive when you see 3 lanes to choose from while traveling through Rochester.

Right Lane - This is the lane on the far right (your other right, Drew). This lane has one primary purpose, to allow people to get on and off of the highway. If you are just getting onto the highway, you are allowed to drive in this lane. If you are exiting the highway WITHIN THE NEXT 2 EXITS, you are allowed to drive in this lane. Note the capital letters in that last sentence please. Just because you have to exit in 3.1 miles, doesn't mean you can be in the right lane making it impossible for people to enter the flow of traffic. And if you do enter the highway traffic, you MUST get out of the right lane before the next entrance ramp. Remember, I don't make up the rules, I just help educate and enforce them. The secondary purpose of the right lane is one I reluctantly admit is a necessity but it's for the really dumb people that feel the need to go WAY slower than the posted speed limit. The speed limit from South Broadway to 55th Street will remain 55mph. Trust me, we have a similar road in Cedar Rapids where I grew up and while the speed limit has varied over the years, it has ALWAYS remained 55mph through the downtown area. The minimum in the right lane is 45mph though. Any slower than that, you should be taking a bus, cab, or side roads.

Center Lane - This is the center lane of the 3 (your other center, Drew). This is for the majority of traffic in Rochester. Once you have entered the flow of traffic, the center lane is the primary lane for traffic to flow in. It allows you to get from point to point without annoying other oncoming traffic from the right lane, and keeps you out of the way of the fast people on the left. We will get to these "cool" people in a minute. The minimum speed for the center lane though is 55mph... the posted speed limit. If you feel the urge to go 50mph, please reread the previous paragraph. If you have an unfortunate bubba in your way going under 55mph, PROCEED WITH CAUTION. This will be the most difficult decision you make all day.......

Left Lane - This is the lane ALLLLLL the way on the left (your other... nevermind). This lane is also known as the "fast lane" and going 55mph does not mean you're going fast. I know Minnes"o"tans have difficulty understanding the difference between left and right lanes on an interstate so please pay careful attention. The minimum speed for the left lane is technically 56 mph but that is not encouraged. Left lane is for passing only, not for driving and talking on your cell phone, or beating the kids in the back seat. Leave the fast driving to us professionals please and stay out of my left lane:)

So with that, I welcome the new Highway 52 and hope and pray that everyone has learned something valuable today. If you have 4 lanes (which there are stretches in Cedar Rapids like this), then the far left lane is the "new" lane and is the speed-trap lane. At this point, the police use helicopters and markings on the pavement to gage your speed so traveling at super fast speeds in that far left lane is highly discouraged!

Tonight is the biggest bowling matchup of the year as the Immortal Brews Brothers take on the Whiney Lightning Dorks. Both are tied in the standings and with 7 points on the line, there is a lot of tension in the air. I'll be there for the beginning but I have to go to rehearsal but hope to have minute by minute updates on my drive and I will of course publish the results here tomorrow. Drew is calling me names trying to derail me (called me Don Zimmer) so I accept that and nicknamed him Pedro. And like Pedro.... my team will show him "WHO'S YER DADDY!!!!"

Song of the Day - Roommate and I went to the public library last night to do some looking. Remember, per the "best of Rochester", that's the place where women like to pick up guys!!! And no Angie, no girl picked up your red headed stud!!! But I found the soundtrack to JFK which has some neat military music. I remember a buddy in High School had it and I always liked it, but it is now impossible to find. So thanks to the Public Library, I am listening to it. Has some really neat drumline tracks if anyone likes that sort of stuff.

Video of the Day - Only video you need to be watching right now is the new Vertigo DVD by U2 - Live from Chicago. Yes, I found Claire on there during Yahweh when i threw her up on my shoulders and said "you WILL be on this DVD"..... it's pretty cool! I haven't seen me up close yet, but haven't gone through the "extras" of the DVD yet.... more to come on my newest claim to fame!! The concert was so incredible though and reiterates the fact that U2 IS the greatest band on earth!!

Webpage of the Day - So in honor of the new U2 DVD, I thought this was pretty funny. But you HAVE to continue watching more than the first 10 seconds. Dad, your hero and idol is in the cartoon towards the end! Enjoy, I got a good laugh out of it!

Have a Wonderful Thursday!! GO BREWS BROS!!!